Protyus A. Gendher
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Disposable
The poem “Disposable” by Protyus A. Gendher reflects the pain of feeling welcomed only to be reminded of one’s outsider status. The author expresses the hurt of false kindness from those who, once boundaries are drawn, reveal that their affection is conditional, leaving the speaker feeling alone and undervalued. Continue reading
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30) Public Shaming
Public shaming in educational settings has severe detrimental effects on children’s identity and mental health. It fosters fear, resentment, and low self-esteem, and reinforces negative behaviors such as bullying. A nurturing environment, free from humiliation, is critical for fostering growth, vulnerability, and overall wellbeing in children facing diverse challenges. Continue reading
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Zebra Files 19) The Symptoms
The author shares a comprehensive list of their various health symptoms and diagnoses, including ADHD, autism, arthritis, and chronic pain. They aim to track their health changes as they interact with specialists and emphasize that the list serves as a reference. Many symptoms are severe and include issues like fatigue and digestive sensitivities. Continue reading
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Zebra Files 18) Understanding Where I’m Coming From
The author shares poetry reflecting on personal health struggles, including mental health, ADHD, and obesity. The poem describes a transformative experience with mental anguish, contemplating death before choosing life. The semicolon symbolizes resilience, representing a continuation of the author’s story despite hardships. The work emphasizes overcoming despair and embracing a renewed existence. Continue reading
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29) Sisters Part Two
The author reflects on the challenging experience of caring for younger sisters, feeling the absence of their mother. Bath time transforms from joy to a struggle, marked by fear and harsh discipline influenced by the mother’s expectations. The narrator grapples with feelings of inadequacy and learns harmful lessons on parenting. Continue reading
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28) Sisters
The author reflects on their complex relationships with younger sisters, shaped significantly by the loss of their father. Sister A, often feeling neglected, developed a distrustful personality, while Sister B became the author’s cherished companion. The narrative explores family dynamics, caregiving responsibilities, and the lasting impact of grief on sibling connections. Continue reading
Conformity and Control, cult of the ego, cycle breaking, Erasing The Silence, grooming, Social Issues, Uncategorizedadvice, anthropology, autoethnography, babies, child rearing, communication, community, content warning, depression, development, family, Free, grooming, health, help, journal, life, me too, Mental Health, milestones, naptime, no paywalls, outreach, personal truth, perspective, preteen, psychology, recovery, resources, self help, self improvement, sib, sisters, sociology, struggle, suicide, survivor, teenager, therapy, toddler, toddlers, training, trauma, trigger warning -
Zebra Files 17) Trying To Hit A Moving Target
The writer compares managing health challenges to eating a whole elephant, emphasizing ongoing struggles with pain, medical tests, and difficult lifestyle choices. They face guilt over limitations and are exploring dietary changes to alleviate symptoms. Despite setbacks, they remain committed to seeking treatment and improving their well-being while acknowledging the complexities involved. Continue reading
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27) Autism
The author reflects on their journey with autism and ADHD, emphasizing the struggles of misdiagnosis and societal expectations. They recount experiences of isolation, misunderstanding, and the challenges of conformity in a rigid educational system. The narrative highlights the need for better recognition of autism, particularly among girls and non-binary individuals. Continue reading
Conformity and Control, cult of the ego, cycle breaking, Erasing The Silence, grooming, Health and Healing, Social Issues, Uncategorizedabuse, adhd, advice, anthropology, assessment, Autism, autistic, autoethnography, communication, community, content warning, diagnosis, family, Free, gender, health, help, journal, life, lifestyle, me too, no paywalls, outreach, personal truth, perspective, psychology, punishment, resources, rfk, schizophrenia, self diagnosed, self help, self improvement, sociology, struggle, survivor, therapy, trigger warning, undiagnosed, vaccine -
Zebra Files 16) While We Wait
The speaker is facing a month-long wait for a neurologist referral and additional delays for a geneticist’s diagnosis. Pending treatments include physical therapy, acupuncture, therapy, massage, chiropractic care, and potential pain injections. They also share a link to an external healing resource. Continue reading
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Zebra Files 15) Meaningless Answers
The author shares their ongoing struggle with persistent symptoms despite normal MRI results, ruling out MS and a CSF leak. They face severe pain, mobility issues, and insurance challenges for necessary physical therapy. A reduction in work hours raises financial concerns, while waiting for further medical evaluations adds to their anxiety. Continue reading
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26) Adolescent Sexuality
The author reflects on adolescence. Continue reading
cult of the ego, cycle breaking, Erasing The Silence, grooming, Poetry, Social Issues, Uncategorizedadolescence, advice, anthropology, autoethnography, autonomy, becoming, bisexual, bonding, communication, community, content warning, dare, experimentation, exploration, family, Free, gender, gender roles, grooming, health, help, journal, life, me too, no paywalls, nonbinary, outreach, pansexual, personal truth, perspective, psychology, resources, self help, self improvement, sexuality, sociology, struggle, survivor, therapy, trans, transgender, trauma, traumabonding, trigger warning, undesirable, unlovable -
Zebra Files 14) Schrodinger’s Brain
The author explores the complex nature of illness and self-doubt through the metaphor of Schrodinger’s brain, likening their symptoms to being simultaneously real and unreal. This internal struggle involves battling a critical inner voice, “Joyce,” and the challenge of seeking validation amidst fluctuating health. The journey highlights the quest for real answers and relief. Continue reading
Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Health and Healing, Protyus Quest for Care, Rare Diagnoses, Social Issues, Uncategorized, Wealthcareadvice, anthropology, autoethnography, body, communication, community, content warning, EDS, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, family, Free, headaches, health, healthcare, help, journal, life, lifestyle, me too, Medical, Medicine, Mental Health, multiple sclerosis, neuropathy, no paywalls, outreach, pain, personal truth, perspective, psychology, regimen, resources, schrodinger, self help, self improvement, sociology, struggle, survivor, symptoms, therapy, trigger warning, Wealthcare, Zebra -
25) My Gender
Protyus A. Gendher’s poem “My Gender” explores the complexities of gender identity through vivid imagery and personal experiences. It reflects on themes of personal struggle, societal expectations, and emotional growth. Gendher illustrates gender as a multifaceted journey filled with chaos, joy, trauma, and resilience, emphasizing self-acceptance and individuality. Continue reading
Conformity and Control, cult of the ego, cycle breaking, Erasing The Silence, Poetry, Social Issues, Uncategorizedacceptance, advice, authenticity, autoethnography, autonomy, becoming, belonging, coming of age, communication, community, content warning, expression, family, Free, gender, gender roles, genuine, health, help, human, humanness, identity, journal, lgbt, life, me too, no paywalls, outreach, personal truth, perspective, Poetry, raw, resources, role behavior, self, self acceptance, self care, self help, self improvement, self love, self worth, struggle, survivor, therapy, trans, trans rights, trigger warning, truth, understanding, vulnerable -
24) It’s Ok
The content explores the complexities of grief through a reflective lens. It emphasizes that it’s acceptable to experience various emotions during mourning, highlighting the notion that one can feel both okay and not okay simultaneously. The author encourages self-acceptance and underscores the importance of personal healing journeys. Continue reading
advice, anthropology, authenticity, autoethnography, communication, community, connection, content warning, family, Free, grief, grieving, healing, health, help, its ok, journal, life, losing people, loss, loved ones, me too, Mental Health, moving on, no paywalls, outreach, personal truth, perspective, poem, Poetry, psychology, recovery, resources, script, script theory, self help, self improvement, struggle, suicide, survivor, therapy, trauma, trigger warning -
Zebra Files 13) Why Blog About It?
The author blogs about their medical journey for three main reasons: to process and analyze experiences, to create a searchable record of symptoms and illness progression, and to emphasize the importance of representation and visibility for shared experiences. Blogging fosters community and encourages open conversations about health struggles. Continue reading
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- Relational Field Theory -How Survivor Literacy Transforms the Future: From Rupture to Regeneration
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Relational Field Theory posits that feelings of personal failure may not indicate individual inadequacy but suggest a collective wound. Sensitive individuals often detect systemic ruptures and misattribution of blame. Healing occurs when one recognizes these wounds are broader than personal experiences, allowing for clarity and a balanced perspective on the situation. - Relational Field Theory – The Collective Wound Cannot Be Resolved by an Individual
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Hau is an influential force beyond the spirit of the gift, activating relational fields that expand identities and connections. The strongest hau arises from unfulfilled gifts, which create lasting connections and open portals to deeper relational contexts. This exploration reveals how hau binds individuals to people and places not yet experienced, enhancing communal identity. - Relational Field Theory – Plurallile Profile: Charlie Love (WWCC Rapa Nui)
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Protyus A. Gendher embodies Relational Field Theory as a phase-shifter, altering environments and facilitating connections across diverse languages and disciplines. Their generative presence cultivates communal agency by transforming individual experiences into collective structures, though they risk self-erasure under pressure. Protyus ultimately reveals hidden patterns, fostering emergent possibilities. - Relational Field Theory –
Allison Quaggin exemplifies a precise and analytical presence in her field, characterized by methodological acuity and intellectual clarity. She organizes complexity by emphasizing structure and evidence, fostering reliable and thoughtful interactions. However, her intensity may come across as cold, potentially limiting emotional nuance and relational warmth.
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Survivor Literacy 