Relational Field Theory

We Choose What We Give Power To

There’s a moment in every creative life where you realize that not everything deserves access to your field. Not every platform, not every system, not every rejection, not every automated email gets to shape your day or your sense of self.

Because the truth is simple:

We choose what we give power to within our own fields.

When Amazon rejected my merch store, I felt the spark of irritation — that old reflex to take it personally, to brace, to fight. But then something in me paused. Something coherent. Something clear.

A voice inside said:

“You know you’re talking about Amazon, right?
Not a community. Not a collaborator.
A corporation built on transactionality.
Are we really surprised?”

And just like that, the charge dissolved.

Because the moment I remembered who I am — and who they are — the power shifted back where it belonged. Not in anger. Not in defiance. Just in clarity.

My ecosystem is relational.
Theirs is transactional.
It’s impressive my field could interface with them at all.

And sometimes the trash takes itself out.

Not everything is meant to stay.
Not every avenue is meant to open.
Not every system is meant to hold what you’re building.

There are so many other ways to bring my work into the world — ways that are more ethical, more aligned, more human. Ways that don’t require me to contort myself into someone else’s architecture.

This is the gift of coherence:
You stop letting every external structure define your trajectory.
You stop giving power to systems that can’t hold you.
You stop mistaking rejection for meaning.

You start choosing.

You choose what enters your field.
You choose what stays.
You choose what shapes you.
You choose what you release.

And the wildest part is this:
Once your internal coherence is stable, the world stops feeling like a gauntlet and starts feeling like a landscape.

You move through it with discernment instead of reactivity.
With presence instead of bracing.
With agency instead of collapse.

Because you know who you are.
And you know what deserves your power.